How to Identify Commies

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dorkelf

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Hello High Programmer Dorkelf!

While shifting through various data files via a binary search pattern over the local network I noticed your bit enticing recruitment notice. My name is VK-19-SA. I would appreciate greatly if you would send us some help documents such that we can know the benefits and obligations of joining in with this prospecting new employer.

Have a nice daycycle citizens!

Well, can we be surprised Citizens that this clone has not been heard from for many day-cycles? I certainly am not, because I have been expecting the Commies to infiltrate this forum. That's right, Citizens...VK-19-SA is a Commie. Let us examine his message, and you will understand how I have reached this conclusion.

First, although the proper name format was clearly announced and followed by previous clones, this citizen ignored this and logged in with a covert 'handle'. This is an effort to hide his true identity. Were his true clone-name revealed, I have no doubt it would turn up on the Computer's termination list.

Second, this Citizen is clearly expecting to receive special benefits for his service. No doubt, he would also receive benefits from his fellow Communists were he allowed to infiltrate a Troubleshooter team. But true, loyal clones never ask what they might receive from the Computer. Instead, they serve the Computer without any expectations or conditions, secretly trusting in their hearts that It will reward them according to Its great wisdom and generosity.

Third, and last, this Citizen has not responded to my questions or requests for clarification for many, many daycycles. Immediate response to superior clones is mandatory. Failure to do so is treason.

Be stalwart, brave Citizens! Commies are everywhere! Trust no one! Keep your laser handy! Should you have any information which may lead to the identification, arrest and execution of this traitorous clone, report immediately to your nearest confession booth. The Computer's Tip for the Day: Have you thanked a Scrub-bot lately? The next time you see one of these small but loyal servants, let it know how much you appreciate its service. And be sure to ask for a summary hygiene inspection while you're at it.

Have a nice day-cycle, friend Citizens.

High Programmer Dorkelf
 
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