Pelagrin
Member
This was sent to me via email and I thought it was pretty funny, so I wanted to share.
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Question: How do you tell the difference between liberals,
conservatives, and southerners?
Answer
ose the following question:
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous lookingman with a huge knife comes
around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the
knife, and charges.
You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
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Liberal Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything
to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What
does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing
the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does
the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety
built into it?Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of
message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd
be
happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family
get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint
and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would
discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for
a few days and try to come to a consensus.
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Conservative Answer:
BANG!
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Southerner's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click....followed by sound of clip ejection and new clip being inserted.
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
=================================
Question: How do you tell the difference between liberals,
conservatives, and southerners?
Answer
ose the following question:You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small
children. Suddenly, a dangerous lookingman with a huge knife comes
around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the
knife, and charges.
You are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot.
You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Liberal Answer:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything
to him that would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What
does my wife think? What about the kids? Could I possibly swing
the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does
the law say about this situation? Does the Glock have appropriate safety
built into it?Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of
message does this send to society and to my children? Is it possible he'd
be
happy with just killing me?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to
wound me? If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family
get away while he was stabbing me? Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a paint
and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would
discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for
a few days and try to come to a consensus.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Conservative Answer:
BANG!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Southerner's Answer:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click....followed by sound of clip ejection and new clip being inserted.
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
